Katie Rules

This is an unfinished blog post from oh... 3 months ago :o

Lately I have been feeling major shrinkage. Unfortunately not physically due to my hours at the gym (The fight to not eat myself out of the work I put in at the gym is real...). The best way I can think to describe it is that I not only feel myself diminishing emotionally, spiritually, mentally and socially, I am seeing the result in my attitude and relationships. It's not something I was happy to realize. I spent many years creating myself (we do not find ourselves, we create ourselves) and I kinda liked the strengths that had replaced some of my weaknesses. Now I'm missing them.

I've been taught that depression is a lack of expression. With a busy and changing life I have neglected the things that have made me, me. Negligence starts in one area and before I know it, the effects snowball into all areas of my life. :'o

On a happy note, if an ignored simple adjustment started me in a downward spiral, then a simple realignment can get me back on track! I just have to be mindful about it.


A few days ago in church our teacher began her lesson by asking to write down some of the things we have learned in life.

These are in no particular order:

1. Never act out of spite
2. Resentments are dumb - don't hold them.
3. Don't take anything personally
4. Always do and give MY best
5. Take initiative. Don't wait.
6. Assume the positive.
7. Be kind - Always.
8. Own my actions. Don't blame others.
9. Forget comparing and judging.
10. Make important decisions in faith based on knowledge, not doubts.


Each one of these "Katie Rules" came about because of what I would label as a defining moment. None of these moments were huge in the moment. Only simple thoughts which crossed my mind when I most teachable.

Below I will recount the simple instances of which each of these small realizations changed the track of my life. They have become my daily mantras to keep me looking in the right direction when there are so many experiences each and every day that tug at me, wanting my attention.

Feel free to read on, or just skip it all together! You know how I can blab on when I think I have an audience. ;) Either way, I would LOVE it if in the comments you would leave your personal rules or defining moments. I love learning from you too!


1. Never act out of spite

This story first learned in my adolescence is admittedly kind of (super) silly. Yet I am SO grateful that this was one of my first "Katie Rules" long before I started calling them that.

It was my freshman year of high school. I had a big desire to attend one of the football games. (Seriously, I know. SO NOT me. But... I wanted to try to make friends... and there was a cute boy or two I hoped to watch in their uniforms. Can you blame me?!) My mom quickly shut me down over the phone. I became upset and fear fueled my emotions. How was I ever going to make friends? How was I going to be cool? How was I ever going to see the boy of my dreams? I was angry at my mom for cutting me off to something so important to me. I started to think of ways that I could disappoint her because she had disappointed me! Ugh!

This is the funny part - the worst thing I could think of to punish my mom for this injustice was to dye my hair black. Whooo! So bad! ;) Yep! I was just going to become a goth that my mom wouldn't understand and be ashamed of. Haha! I laugh just thinking about it. {Never mind how I was even going to make that happen when I couldn't even get to a football game ;)}

Then the simple thought came through my mind, "If you do this to make Mom mad, you would also make God unhappy." That's it. Just simple. {And really, we know that God's only going to be unhappy because he knows it's going to make US unhappy and miserable once we start down that road. }

In that moment I learned forever, to never do anything out of spite. It will only end up hurting myself.


2. Resentments are dumb - don't hold them.

One of the things I learned on my LDS mission while being 24/7 with the same person is that resentments can grow very quickly if I am not on constant guard. I am persuaded that this is one of the adversary's top tools to bring relationships to quick deterioration. Great idea! Only one person needs to be effected, then they'll pave an unknown amount of destruction on their own!

One of my companions early on in my mission was very quiet and rarely spoke. You'd think this could be a blessing! As much as I tried, I couldn't get her to carry on a conversation. She gave short answers and twirled her hair, seemingly oblivious to the world around her. There was a lot of quiet time for my imagination to run wild, filling the void with what I thought she was really thinking - She hated me. She thought I was a bad person. She didn't like me. She thought my decisions of our daily activities were wrong. Why else wouldn't you talk to someone you had to be with all day, every day?

Because of these thoughts that I began believing I started to resent her. If she didn't like me, then I didn't like her either! These strong thoughts lead to powerful emotions that continued to weaken our companionship. Again - just a simple moment with a simple more powerful thought entered into my mind - "Katie! This is ALL in your head! You have never talked to her about this, let alone spoken aloud about this (because, you know, things just sound so much more ridiculous when you actually say it verbally). How do you know that it is even real?? Are your feelings justified?"

I came to the conclusion that I have absolutely zero right to hang on to a resentment about someone if I am unwilling to discuss my feelings with them openly in a non-blaming manner. Because if I don't, I have no way to know if what I am feeling is based on any kind of truth (they usually aren't).

I'm grateful I learned this early in my mission, because it was a pattern I would see repeated with almost every companion. It allowed me to be aware and watch out for it so I would recognize when to slap those thoughts down early on with a metaphorical beating!

3. Don't take anything personally

Come with me to college now :) In my business class I had spent the first couple weeks sitting next to a boy I thought was cute and funny. Two of my favorite things!! We talked and laughed every day we sat in class. I thought it was way beyond the point of when he should have asked me out. On the day I had decided I would be bold and ask him out he surprised me (!) by inviting me over to his apartment that evening for a fire with his roommates. Oh! I was SO happy and excited!

That evening I prepared myself to look and smell so good (teen girl squad voice). I got in my car, drove up to his apartment house and knocked boldly on his door at the designated time. One of his roommates answered the door. I asked if my future boyfriend (I used his name, not that term. Don't worry ;) ) was there. His roommate looked confused, scratched his head, looked around, then finally looked back with a pitying look and told me he wasn't. My rare confidence had quickly faded and I felt 2 inches tall. If you knew me then, you know how shy and timid I was, especially when it came to dealing with the opposite sex. Embarrassed I told him thank you and ran back to my car and drove home.

I wanted to be angry. I was hurt and humiliated. This kid didn't even have the courtesy to call me up to tell me plans had changed, he got stuck somewhere... yadda yadda, excuses excuses. Before this experience I would have been tempted to think that because he had forgotten me that I was a nobody. Because he placed so little value on me, that that must be what I was worth.

Instead once I got home I changed into some comfortable sweats and jumped on my bike for a ride - something I have always loved. I knew somehow that his lack of respect for me wasn't a manifestation of my worth, but rather a reflection of him and who he is. I didn't have to take his treatment or forgetfulness of me personally. I didn't even have to get bent out of shape. It just was what it was.

The following Monday I knew I would see him again. I had the choice to treat him as someone who had offended me and wasted my time (and perfume... well, I guess it's okay to smell good all the time ;) ) or.. not. On Monday I greeted him like I usually did. I don't think it was until that moment that he realized his social faux pas. He made his excuses and I quickly forgave him. We remained friends. Though I never cared if he asked me out again :) I knew that he was not the kind of man I wanted to date.

4. Always do and give MY best

After graduating from college I worked and danced around in many jobs to support my other job of portrait photography. One of the jobs I passed through was working at a dry cleaners. Not the most glamorous job. But the girls there were fun to talk to and I even got a mini facial about every 3 minutes as I pressed hundreds of suit pants each day.

I was working away in my back corner when I heard one of the ladies greet a customer. After the customer left, this woman commented to another worker that should not have said "Hi" to the guy because he didn't deserve her kindness.

I considered that for a moment. I didn't know the person she was speaking about. He could have been a real slime ball. Yet it's not our call to judge, but rather to love. Do we not always deserve to give the best to others because we owe it to ourselves and to our character to give others the benefit of the doubt?

We deserve to always give our best. Not because those around always deserve it, but because we owe it to ourself to always offer our best. Like in non-future husband's example above - our actions are not a reflection of those around us, just ourselves.

5. Take initiative. Don't wait.

This one is simple - so simple. No long story here! I overheard someone I highly respected say simply that in her household they were taught to take the initiative. If you see something that needs to be done - just do it. We don't need to wait for someone else to do it. Using the excuses of "I did it last time" or "I don't know how" or "I didn't make the mess" or any other variance is just a waste of time. Take an extra moment, learn something new and make things happen!

6. Assume the positive.

This one isn't so much my own story. It's more of Sheri Dew's. In one of her books she recounted the experience of when she had reacted harshly to one of her counselors. This counselor took no offense. Rather the next day she stopped by Sheri's with a treat and a kind word. She showed love and concern. Sheri apologized and admitted her outburst was out of other frustrations.

I thought at that moment I thought to myself, "I want to be that person. Someone who can assume positively and give others the benefit of the doubt". This one is definitely a work in progress for me.

7. Be kind - Always.

I think bringing in together 1, 2, 3, and 4 "Katie Rules" just automatically creates another one.

Often my instinctive reaction when I feel that I have been wronged or hurt is blame others, to get angry, or to hurt them back. I'm not very physically tough so my method would be sharp retorts of the tongue meant to wound the spirit. Something that can be far more damaging with longer effects.

I once read in a book by Kerry Blair, "Words spoken in haste are often lamented in leisure". It is a good reminder to hold my tongue when my passions are flared. I don't like regrets and if I have fewer words and actions to regret later - all the better :)

I've thought to myself that I want to always be kind, even if at the moment I don't feel like it or feel that others 'deserve' it. I have never once regretted kindness, no matter the circumstance. But I have often regretted rudeness in the quiet moments of self reflection.

8. Own my actions. Don't blame others.

I was a pharmaceutical technician for about a year during one of my multiplicity of jobs after college. I worked with a woman who was quick to take ownership for her mistakes. I loved that! Up to this point in my life (and still now) it is a very rare characteristic to find in others. Someone who will step up and claim their own fallacy with boldness and confidence. She didn't fear embarrassment or shame at admitting her blunders. Yet because she was quick to judge her own faults, she was able to become better. It was never in a self defeating way - she saw her mistake and quickly made changes to fix the problem.

Imagine what a better world it would be- in work and in relationships - if more would adopt this characteristic - That instead of looking around to find who or what we can blame, we take a good look at ourself. That will fix far more issues than blaming. There's not much we can do to change those around us. However, we there's a whole lot we can change in ourselves.

9. Forget comparing and judging. 

What girl doesn't compare and judge herself by measuring herself up to her peers? I've come to realize that comparing myself to others only brings me stress, anxiety, and despair. Once I realized that we tend to compare our worst with other's best, or the full story of our life with the glimpses and assumptions we make of others - our comparisons are lousy at best.

10. Make important decisions in faith based on knowledge, not doubts. 

China - May 2017

We can doubt as long as the day is long. There will never be a shortage of doubts. Often times I've been tempted to take the easy out. Easy being making choices based on what I can see, what I know and are within my comfort zone.

I have missed out on multiple experiences and relationships because I was making choices based on my present knowledge and doubts.

So many experiences have taught me to "feel the fear and do it anyway"-as they say - like my decision to travel to Guam alone (just traveled alone, I wasn't alone there :) ), a decision to serve a mission, and eventually the decision to marry Christopher along with tons of others.

There will be many unknowns throughout life that will continuously persuade us to shrink back.

I don't want to miss out on something wonderful just because I don't have all the answers right now. I choose to move forward making choices with what I DO know.

I know that God lives. And I do know that he wants all of us to live with him again one day. And most of all, I know that if I make mistakes in this life, God miraculously, lovingly and mercifully can turn my missteps to good and benefit as I continue to look to Him. 

Happy Like Lehi

This is a post I started June 21, 2015 - now over 2 years ago... It's been living in the drafts of my blog. I thought that it deserved to be finished. I am sad that I didn't finish it as the passion and inspiration that began the entry have somewhat disappeared with time and negligence. I will do my best to finish what was started: 


Yesterday was my birthday. YAY!! I'm old(er) now.... Yay?... :o ;)

Truly - I like my birthday. It's a day about me and marking my time of making the world a better place just by being birthed (Shout out to my Mamma! Thanks, Ma!) And instead of looking at it as another year I will never get back and farther away from my youth, I have decided to change my perspective that another year older is another year down - another year closer to the next phase of life, which I hear is even better than this one. :)

Yet... at the same time. I'm 29. You know the days of youth when you would write down lists of the things you wanted to achieve and the person you wanted to become? Yeah, well... that hasn't worked out for me [yet]. Life has been one surprise right after another. Without mentioning any specific experience(s) I thought I would have experienced by now, I am tempted to dislike my life because I feel like a failure in those regards. I remind myself daily to not compare my position in life with that of others. That even when I think that I am on plan 'T,' I am still on God's 'Plan A' for my life.

It's at moments like these that the scriptures really add perspective to my life. There's a reason God wants us to read them frequently... like every day :)

A few months into my mission I had started reading the Book of Mormon from the beginning again. I was in the 2nd chapter of the 1st book. God is talking to Lehi in verse 2 and is telling Lehi how blessed he is for being faithful and obedient in declaring repentance his people. Those blessings are those same people were now attempting to kill him.

I think we (or am I alone here?) fail to notice how awesome Lehi is. Probably because it's Nephi's book and we get caught up in his stud-liness that we overlook the old guy that is Nephi's father.

Ooh, which reminds me, I left you with a teaser last week. In 1st Nephi, chapter 2, v. 1, the Lord came to Lehi and said, "Blessed art thou Lehi, because" and then it says thanks for obeying my commandments and ends with and others want to "take away your life". Say wha?! All in the same sentence! I'm blessed because people want to kill me?? Lehi is a great man to learn from. The Lord says, Lehi, go and teach this people to repent. He does it. The people hate it, and then hate on Lehi. But, Lehi's blessed and people want to take his life. Then the Lord comes to Lehi again and tells him to leave his home, his job, his house... everything he knows to go out and live in the wilderness for who knows how long. Talk about hard. So because Lehi is blessed, people want to kill him, he has to leave his home and money, and his sons hate him. Sweet. But what does Lehi do?? 1 Ne. 2:7. He builds an altar and gives thanks to the Lord. Yep. I need to be more like Lehi. Most definitely!! Look up 2 Cor. 12:9. Glory in infirmities. Talk about changing your perspective about hard times. 


That's it... where was I going with this? Before my mid-entry tangent and life hindrance. I remember that a couple days prior to beginning this entry I had a conversation about our beliefs with a friend who is not LDS but falls beneath the Christian umbrella. He told me that though we disagreed, he had a high level of respect for me - even if my beliefs were "kooky". {Mmm... I like cookies... FOCUS KATIE!} I remember feeling complimented that day because he called me "kooky", and I thought that it made me a little bit like Lehi. His family thought he was a little crazy, and he accepted it (1 Nephi 5:1-4). I mean, who wouldn't want to be like the person who can find it in himself to be give thanks and be joyous in the midst of trial, tribulation and the all around hated facing the unknown? He chose to look up and see what God saw, rather than allowing himself to be hindered like so many of us with short sighted-ness.

Yep, I think being happy like Lehi is a worthy goal indeed! 

Perspective 31

Turning 31 has definitely been harder than turning 30. Why? Getting kicked out of the singles ward, or to be ‘politically’ correct - being ‘invited to leave’ the singles ward has had a huge impact. I no longer feel I am wanted or feel like I belong. That’s me. It’s nothing to do with others. I just plain feel ashamed or embarrassed that I've failed in a few things in life. 

I knew it was coming. To be completely honest I’ve had very little to do with the YSA since returning home from my mission. My friends were gone, I had little time to make more friends, and now I felt old compared to the ward. I had a hard time feeling like I connected with the majority of the ward members. My busy schedule made it hard for me to attend activities. When I did attend I felt that rift. Self-imposed? Sure, I’ll take the blame. Nothing but excuses. I can openly admit my weaknesses. Relationships are 2 ways and I didn't do my part. I eventually gave up all together in the two years since my RM status. I simply went to church, took the sacrament, sat, learned, contributed comments in class, fulfilled my calling(s) and left. It was my place to go on Sunday with people who I didn't grow up with and happened to be single, just like me. I at least belonged in that one aspect. 

I knew my departure would take place and in a way I was ready for it. Yet at the same time it brought a strong sorrow and depression into my heart and mind that surprised me. I felt like I have failed in attaining the great Mormon directive and dream - Get married to a good man in the temple for time and eternity and start making a family. Easy!…ier said then done. My Bishop telling me during his ‘invitation’ to leave talk days before my birthday (they couldn’t wait to get the almost 31 year old riff raff out of that building) that he “understood” did not help one iota. I had no idea that a 40 something year old man who married a former mission companion’s sister could empathize so perfectly with a 31 year old female who has never had the opportunity to marry up to this point in life… Just a reminder to myself when I am in that kind of situation that instead of faking it, own up to my ignorance. That is far less demeaning to the person who is struggling. Sympathize, don't pretend to empathize. 

This is one of the great trials of life - being single that is. My life has turned out nothing like I supposed or imagined or hoped. In the big stuff - like finding a companion to share life with. I don’t care that I changed my major 3 times during my university years, or that I am not driving a green car, or going on a mission when I didn’t plan to or that I ended up in Ravenclaw instead of Gryfinndor… oh wait… never mind. 

One of the greatest blessings of my mission was how it changed my perspective on life. Going on a mission I knew before where I was going, how long I would be there, and that it was going to be character building, aka “tough” ;) General stuff. I didn’t know details - the people I’d serve with, the callings I would hold, the wards I would serve, the people I would teach. Though I knew how long I would be there, it didn’t help me feeling like those 18 months were going to be what made up the rest of my life during the tough times. Yet the details - Jamie, Sister Atkinson, Karen, etc - made it so much more enjoyable and worth it. 

Before coming to this earth I knew the general stuff - I was coming here to be tested and tried for about 1 day (now at least 32 years) to 100 years. The details - my family, growing up in Rexburg, etc - have made it enjoyable. Yet there are trials - the tough, character building stuff - that make it seem like this is it. 

I know I’m getting wordy in trying to explain myself… Let me try to bring it in for you. Being on my mission there were days I thought my mission was all there had ever been, was and would be. With a perspective like that it was easy to get down hearted, depressed, miserable, gloomy and grouchy. Yet I knew despite my dismal self that there would be an end, I would get to see my happy details (family :) ) again, I would get to return back to Rexburg (I know that doesn’t sound exciting to some… but now that I’ve seen and lived other places, I really love my hometown), my big comfy bed, I would get to go places alone, I would get to be with my DSLR again, and get to choose a different schedule in my life one day. Hurray! Being reunited with my family and imagining that moment gave me peace, comfort and hope. Those 18 months weren’t going to last forever. I just needed to buck up and give the very best I could offer at that moment and enjoy the mission details while I could. Because one day this blessing of a mission would only be a memory I would look back on, and I wanted as few regrets as possible. 

Likewise, this time on earth has purpose and it has an end. And even though I don’t get what I want when I want how I want it - It’ll be okay. Because I am Heavenly Father’s child. He has a purpose and plan for me. (I sometimes wonder if he does… yet my testimony that he does was born out of seeing His hand in so many of the live’s of those I taught during my mission [Silly how it’s easier for us to recognize God’s hands in the lives of others than it is to recognize it in our own at times].) This life isn’t all there is and there is still plenty of time for good things, even great things to happen! Having a vision of my reunion with Heavenly Father after this life gives me the strength to not give so much acknowledgement, worry, concern and anxiety attacks during the character building of this life. A vision of greater things to come gives me perspective of life now. At the end of this life, I still want to have as few regrets as possible. 

As a missionary, I was on average 5-7 years older than the rest of the missionaries I served with, also giving me a different perspective. I had already lived a ‘real life’ after high school and college before starting out on my mission adventure. I’ve heard many missionaries report that their mission was the hardest thing they have ever done up to that point in their life. It wasn’t so with me. It was hard, but life is hard. It was hard in a different way. I didn’t have to worry about gas, utilities, dating, etc. In a way missionary life was a breeze! In a way, not every way :) 

No matter who you are or where you are there are times we feel we’ve been dealt the losing hand or we may even think to God, ‘when it gets too quiet up there, You say to Yourself, "What kind of mischief can I play on My friend ___(insert your name here___?” (Gotta love Tevye!) We all have aspirations, goals, and ambitions in life, whether large or small. When those expectations aren’t met we automatically think we’ve been jilted or forgotten. This is not the case. It’s … life. Just life. And it won’t last forever. It’s just something we have to get through, and we will. Even if we struggle. There is no person who is free from life and caring about something in it. We may have different life expectations and experiences, therefore different trials. Everyone struggles differently. That is why we have the tender mercies of the happy details. A day resting in the sun, listening to the laughter of children, and so much more. Where am I going to allow the weight of my daily joy of life to rest - upon the details or the trials?

(On a side note - I once tested the theory that if I could get rid of all my expectations, I would have no disappointments, and therefore have more happiness. I don’t recommend this method… It leads to another kind of melancholy sorrow. It’s finding that balance of having expectations and continuing to hope and persevere through what we view as a set back or unanswered prayers in our limited perspective.)

This in no way effects my testimony of the true and living church. I still want to go to church, I just don’t feel like I belong in any ward right now. It’s just tough. And that’s okay. I’ll build character. I’ll be able to honestly empathize with others who may face this in their life. It may take me awhile, but I’ll figure it out and make it through. Which will give me knowledge, experience and strength to one day hopefully strengthen others. I’ll gain courage to attend once again the ward of my youth as an adult. (Cries.) This is just a little pebble. I know so many who suffer so much more. A special thanks to Christopher who knows how important this part of my life is and gave me a little pep talk reminding me of what is and isn’t important, encouraging me to go despite the stoopid feelings I have inside. That’s a real friend.

I will never allow a dumb, non-eternal church policy to destroy my love of true eternal doctrine and the testimony I have worked many years to build. I’ll look back on this time one day and know that I gave my best that I could offer at that time. My best this week will be different from my best last week and my best next week. But I’ll always offer my best. 

A Treasure

On this eve 4 years ago I was uneasy as I ironed my skirt for the next day and prepared for bed. On the morrow I would begin a new chapter of my life. Everything I knew would be traded in for the unknown as I left the comforts of home to become missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. That night I wished that I could wake up the next morning with the next 18 months behind me.

It's crazy now to realize I've now been home longer than I was gone. Believe it or not, those 18 months do feel like a dream (something I didn't think could ever be true). Not a day goes by that I don't have a memory or a flashback of someone or something from my time spent in Georgia and Florida. A park, a moment, a kitchen, a road, a text, a door, a person, a lesson, a meal, a conversation, an awkward instant, a garage, a voicemail, a piano solo, a baptism, a phone call... so many jewels in my memory. Those times, experiences, places - and most importantly - strangers who became my dearest friends and family in the south - will be forever a treasure in my life and heart.

I love my Savior. I pray I may always live my life so that those around me may feel of His love for them. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ - Now and Forever.

God be with you until we meet again.

'16 Going on '17

Been a while for the ole bloggity blog, eh?

2016 has been a grand adventure. Maybe it hasn't brought me everything I ever wanted or hoped for, but I do have the rest of eternity for that afterall :) I am so grateful for the experiences I've had and for the people who have enriched my life!

Some highlights!

I am a sewing fiend! Okay, not really... but I did take up some sewing projects of my own free will and actually did alright! First off I made an apron - turned out super cute! Then I made a levi quilt from a favorite pair of jeans that fell apart, yet that I didn't want to part with - also turned out awesome!.. ish. Don't look close ;) For something that was made to be thrown on the ground it is absolutely flawless! My last sewing project were these cute little owls that you fill up with corn and warm up in the microwave for a couple minutes to give you some extra warmth on these frigid Idaho nights (and days). It started off on a whim with a good friend, but then all the cute little nieces and nephews saw them and wanted one a piece... and well, I'm just not very good at telling their cute little faces "No". I must say, I got pretty good at sewing on eyeballs!

TRAVEL!! I love to travel!!! And this year brought me some great trips:

SOUTH AFRICA!! I love this place. I hope to have the opportunity to go again and again! You can see some select pictures on my FaceBook. I really need to get more of those RAW files converted to JPGS.... :o

NEBRASKA!! I got to spend a wonderful week with Heidi and her family. We were hit with a surprising snow storm in the days leading up to Easter that had us shoveling the drive way for a couple hours. We cooked the yummiest brownies I have EVER had in my life and - oh - SEWED owl pillows! (I love owls) I loved my week there and was sad when it was time to tell them 'good-bye'. :(

Freak snowstorm!

ALASKA! Have I mentioned I love my job? If it weren't for my job I wouldn't have such favorable circumstances that allow me to travel and photograph places I never dreamed of. Alaska was breathtaking and the bears were so much fun to see! I'd go again in a heartbeat.

SEATTLE! So this was a fun little layover pit stop on the way back from Alaska where I FINALLY got to visit my cousin, Ryan. He spoiled me rotten while I was there! He took me to the coolest movie theatre I've ever watched (and dozed off to {I seriously have issues.}) a movie in, toured me around Boeing, and drove me all over the place taking me to the coolest museums, sight seeing spots, and restaurants possible in a short period of time.

BEAR LAKE! This place that is SO close to home has been one of my favorite places since I was young. This year I was invited to go down with my bestie Sam and cousin Craig. Though I rarely see them, it's times like these that remind me why they are a couple of my favorite people ever and the people who got me through my college and early post college years. They planned a fan-tab-ulous adventuresome itinerary while we were there which included the very entertaining play of Jaunito Bandito at the Pickleville playhouse, setting up a tent and camping, and riding a surrey - so much fun!

FAMILY VACA to Glacier National Park!

We hit up Virginia and Nevada City on the way up

One of my life-long dreams came true! I finally got to dress up for an old-timey photo! 

Pushing Meg's 'burb at the campsite

This next year will bring China, India... and dare I hope... ICELAND?!?! We'll see. I have began teaching classes at Perfect Light Camera and Supply, along with offering classes at a local community college in Idaho Falls. I love sharing knowledge and helping others. Photography is one of my loves, along with people and teaching. I feel incredibly blessed that I am able to do something I love. I work with great people who make it easy to go to work every day.

Oh! And I turned 30! For a milestone this big, you'd think I'd remember! A couple weeks ago I told someone I was 29... so I guess it just hasn't sunk in yet ;) Or, maybe I'm in denial? ;)

Unforeseen yet inevitable faith trying circumstances occur that serve to strengthen my resolve to follow our Savior's example and teachings. My love for Him never dwindles or diminishes. In trying times and hopeless filled hours I am grateful for the peace He offers. I know that as long as I look to Christ, everything will be okay. :)

This was on the board one week before I began my Sunday School lesson. I couldn't bring myself to erase it, because let's face it, who doesn't want to be a Jedi?!? Come to find out, I've been one my ENTIRE life!! :D

Some other pics:

All of us! August 2016

This little gem was a happy surprise as I was driving up to Glacier National Park. My mission president had this on his wall and it was a theme for our mission (BTW - I've now been home 2 WHOLE YEARS!! I can't believe it!) I didn't even know it was a real place! 

Meg and I attended "Queen of the Kingdom" with Natalie. We all had a good time! This is Meg and I with Kim Duncan 

In February I went with work to WPPI in Vegas. It was an exciting experience!

10,000 Steps

A couple months ago I got myself a fitbit. The standard daily goal is 10,000 steps per day. Sounds easy, right? With a happy grin on my face I ripped the package open. I clipped it on myself as a new fitbit owner and hit the pavement... sort of. :o After a couple of weeks after I had NEVER reached the objective of 10,000 steps per day I realized I didn't move as much as I thought I did. I exercise religiously at least a half hour every day and I have a job that I'm not at a desk. Yet I was struggling big time to get my steps in.

As with most things in life, I figured 10,000 steps a day wasn't just going to happen, I had to make it happen. I set a goal to get 10,000 steps a day. For reals. I was going to make it happen! It was hard (sort of). I had to make sacrifices. What started out as a simple, maybe silly goal, has brought me so many tender mercies and pleasant surprises as I've (gotten creative at times to) attain my goal. Like connecting with my young self by jumping rope in the dark in the drive way at the end of the day because I still needed more steps and I was bored of running in place. Haha :)

Though my goal was a physical one, what I really received was strengthened relationships. Since I was making this goal a non-negotiable accomplishment in my life, what better than to bring friends along? I got to talk as I walked with my sister-in-law, a mission friend, and as well as a best friend I haven't seen in a long time. I spent some quality time with my Dad watching a documentary as I ran in place inside (it was raining outside). I went for a run with my uncle on his awesome trail. I took the opportunity to play freeze tag with my nephews and niece.

And I made it! It was only 7 days, but I did it!! Mission: Accomplished! Next goal ---> 10,000 steps a day for a month! Bring it one :)

I know that when we set goals to better ourselves, God finds ways to bless us in many ways we didn't expect! One of those ways is that as we better ourselves we can help those around us too. 

Serving God With My Emotions

Life 'A-ha' moment this weekend! In preparation for a lesson on Sunday I was reading through different materials. As I read through chapters here and chapters there something clicked for me.

Throughout my mission, like many missions all over the world, we recited Doctrine and Covenants Section 4 every day. Sometimes multiple times a day. Verse 2 of that section holds the secret to success as we pursue God's will:

Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of God, see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind and strength that ye may stand blameless before God at the last day. 

One of the author's I read this weekend defined those as the following:

Heart = emotions and sentiments 

Might = will power

Mind = intellect and reasoning ability

Strength = time and energy

Whoa! Wait? What? Our heart = our emotions?!?! In all my previous studies I had equivalated (I totally just made that word up... my blog, my words! Haha! It is Sophisti-KATE-tion after all ;) )  my heart as my desires -

"Do I desire to serve God? Yep. Check! Done. Next?" 

NO!! Cut off short. I then asked myself, "Can I serve God with my emotions? Yes. Am I doing that?"

That got me thinking, "How can I serve God with my emotions?"

I thought of how when I do not control my thoughts, which lead to my emotions, I am prone to dwell on petty feelings. For example - resentments, offenses, jealousies, anxieties, self pity, etc. None of these which lead me to ACT (strength) in service to God with all that I have. 

It starts out so little. Lately I have felt so hopeless, or without hope. I know that this is draining my ability and power to reach up to heaven to draw down those powers available to God's children to bring about miracles here on earth... I'll work on that. Today I am carrying a paper around with me so I can track my thoughts. I can catch the Father of Lies in his tracks! When we know the plan of our foes it gives us power to conquer them. I will train my brain to think positively. I will have dominion over this instrument God has blessed me with to be faithful and fearless! :D 

Let's go get today!!

Life's Compostion

Tonight I taught a group of young girls some basic photography skills and composition tips. A perfect union of two of my favorites. I love photography and I love sharing knowledge. I believe that I have found my calling in life! 

Though most people aren't thinking about composition when they look at a photograph, they do notice when it is pleasing to look at even if they don't know why. A snapshot may capture a moment, but a photograph tells a story. Though I can't claim that anything is entirely original we all have unique experiences and points of view. I often say that everyone is living in their own reality made of of their own perspective created by the way they were raised, where they grew up, who they associated with, what they have observed, how they interpret what they see... so many variables that make up one's very own unique perspective. No one tells the same story, which is why it is so important that every one find their own way of expressing themselves. I love being able to facilitate in any way that I can the someone else's ability to create. Whether it's something technical like the aperture triangle or simply being their cheerleader. :) God is a creator. He is THE Creator. So when we create we are becoming a little bit more like Him as well as increasing our relationship with him. The most important thing when creating is to just do it. It sure doesn't have to be perfect. Waiting for perfection before we create will guarantee perfection will never be attained. 

Check out this picture:

Wow! A kitchen sink! Woop-ti-doo! I can hear you now, "Katie... why are we looking at this??"  My friends, this simple and boring picture shot during my early picture-taking career represents a life 'a-ha' moment. Story time!! :D

I was adventuring in California with my bestie, Sam, and staying with our other friends who resided in Cali. Can I just say - cutest apartment ever?!? I loved the attention and time they had given into making their apartment a home. It was SO cute and incredibly well decorated for a couple of young single girls. For example - The first thing I saw when I walked into the apartment was a huge tree painted on the wall! 

The morning before Sam and I left Cali, I made sure to photograph every room - no room escaped the sensor of my camera! As I went to take a picture of the kitchen and checked everything through my viewfinder before clicking the shutter, my eye stopped at the sink... dirty dishes....!! The first thought that came to my mind was, "Well, I could wash them". But I didn't want to. {Hey! Don't judge. Time was short. Dishes are a chore I don't mind so much. Just ask any of my missionary companions :) } My next thought was I could remove them, then put them back after my shot. But there's that time issue again, and I'd probably get dirty dish goop on my hands. My third thought was the winner -

"Kate! This is easy! Just change your perspective!!" So I did. I squatted lower {This is the real reason I've taken up yoga - better camera angle positioning posing strength!}. And you know what happened??! The dishes disappeared! It was a clean, empty sink! At least as far as the photo was concerned! In the moment that was all that mattered! They didn't show in the picture and they didn't exist in the captured moment! 

How often do we have 'dirty dish' moments in our lives? It could be a hurtful comment. Or receiving the cold shoulder. A bad test score. Or feeling like we've been forgotten by those who mean the most to us. How about unmet expectations? From ourselves, family, or life? Our dirty dishes can at times seem overwhelming and exhausting. Yet, does the problem lie in what is really there? Or in how we perceive it? 

I can't count the times in life that I have felt let down or forgotten by God. These feelings - though they seem silly and irrational when I talk about them out loud - seem very real - and has given me a set of trust issues. Haha! But, seriously... ;) When those times come and my mind is filling up with evidence of broken trust, I can choose to change the composition. I search for and count evidences of the times he hasn't let me down and say a prayer in gratitude for those times. I especially look for times when I was hoping for something and got a completely different thing in real life - but it still worked out- often times better than what I could have hoped for. Or as the music group, "fun." sings it, "Man, you wouldn't believe the most amazing things that can come from...Some terrible nights". Most times these scenarios take time to recognize the good fruit that come from hard situations. But they are there if we look for them. Having faith is work, and at times it is hard to be consistent in the little things, especially when we don't see any results when we are expecting them. 

Whatever happens, God is in it if we have invited him. Most of the time all it takes is permitting ourselves to shift our perspective from what we want now in the moment {if you're like me then you know what it's like to not know what you want - but whatever it is you don't know you want you still want it right now!} to what God sees and is showing us. We are here to fail. But we are here to get back up and try again tomorrow. As long as we give God our best we have done our part. Some days our best may be better than other days. Other days it will not be as good. I think God understands. 

Here is the good news with the perspective shift - When we feel like this it means we've mastered a another life level! When things get hard or we feel emptiness  growing inside - I can choose to see that as an invitation to dig deeper within myself to stretch upward and reach higher to increase my relationship with God. There are moments when I despair in my thoughts. On occasion, in weakness it even leaks out of my mouth. A quote from one of my favorite people comes to mind when I do, "Don't be defeatist dear. That is so middle class". I remind myself that we truly are royalty. Our Father is the King. He is in charge. I limit myself by allowing the adversary to convince me that I am empty. I'm in no way saying that what we feel isn't real, because it is real and it is hard. Once I accept those, I give myself power to overcome :) 

Life really is so good. These past few weeks have been a struggle. A struggle I blame on my own shallow perspective. I spoke to my bestie, Sam, on Sunday and she commented on how happy I sounded. I told her I was working hard (sometimes, it really is work - most definitely a concerted effort) to be happy and not let life get me down. It's tiring. But it's working! Fake it 'til you become it, right?! :) There are moments I just want to give up. But I won't. I will keep trying. I will continue on. I will hope on. I will plead and pray for strength. I ask God to send me messages that he is aware of me every day and every moment when I feel like I have been forgotten and set aside. I pray that I will be able to see and recognize those moments to not only give thanks, but to give proof to the faith that I think I already have.

There it is. In a nutshell - Change our perspective = Change our story. :) 

Nailed It

Lily Allen wrote a song specifically for my life!

Strangers

I don't love Chinese food. I could take or leave it. I usually leave it unless I'm with a friend who loves it and I get a fortune cookie :) It's a good deal! Last Saturday I got a fortune cookie:

{Somebody needs a manicure!! And her name starts with 'K' and and with a 'T'}

How true and how perfectly timed. Last Saturday was the last day of a four day training I attended - Present Yourself. This training focused on being a messenger. Every day there are troubled people and times surrounding us. We can choose to see a problem and come up with solutions. As we share these solutions to those around us we become a messenger. We can be a messenger about anything! Any thing that we are passionate about that we feel will add to the value of others' lives. Whether its sharing the message of magical water from the mountains of China or, in my case, teaching others an art form so they can have a way to create to bring them closer to God.

While at this seminar I was blessed to meet so many amazing people! I started out in a room with 200 strangers. By the end of those 4 days a few of those strangers had become my trusted friends who did bring great meaning into my life and I believe they will continue to do so.

Angela: I met her the first day during our lunch break. I had walked over to the closest eating establishment and went outside to eat. She followed me out there, sat down next to me and then we were friends!

Mike: When I went back to the seminar I saved a seat for Angela. As the training was beginning a big burly man came and sat in the open seat next to Angela. They knew each other! They had gone to high school but hadn't seen each other since. What are the odds?? :) As the training came to a close tears were streaming down his face and his nose was running as he hugged me good bye. Tender hearted big cuddly bear!

Thomas: I saw Thomas the first day and thought he looked super familiar. I thought so again when I saw him the second day. I finally approached him and asked if he was from Rexburg. He was! We had met years ago at a trade show. He is a fireball - full of energy and very funny. He is my age, the father of 5 kids and one of the most creative minds I have ever met. He is the owner of a distributing company and is an amazing business entreprenuer who knows how to get things done!

Abrianna: We kept running into each other throughout the seminar and even danced it up together during the rockstar night. She is a young mother of a four year old. She aspires to be a mentor and is focused on her goals and will do anything to make it happen. She's an inspiration and we will be friends for years to come.

I love meeting people and getting to know who they REALLY are. How they think and what experiences have shaped their perspectives. I love finding out about their dreams they are pursuing. It reveals so much about their hearts.

My takeaway:

The love of God breaks down any barriers : social, age, schooling... ANYTHING. If we are focused on loving and helping others, we can lift any body wherever they are and great friendships will follow! How wonderful it feels to know we are not alone. :)

In God I Trust

These past few weeks and months I have sent many questions heavenward as I have searched for life answers and direction in my life. Sometimes Heavenly Father is a little slow coming with the answers or maybe I haven't recognized the answers as they have come yet. I've noticed that as I have not gotten the answers I've wanted or when I wanted, my brain takes the initiative to fill in the void. Problem is, when my brain does that it tends to come up with the best worse case scenarios!!

This week as I was walking into work I spotted a copper speck in the parking lot. I bent down to pick up the penny and remembering a story my dad shared with me years ago I asked myself, "Am I trusting God right now, this moment?" 

I was so grateful for this reminder. If I am trusting in God I will not allow the questions of the future worry me so much that today becomes bitter. I will not let the questions of tomorrow rob the pleasantries of today. I will keep trusting and take everything a day at a time, a moment at a time. And as weeks, months and years go by I know as I look back I will realize that our Father in Heaven was guiding me all along. 

Because of The Book of Mormon!

Because of the Book of Mormon I.....

My 'rememberer' wasn't working when I first discovered The Book of Mormon. As far as I know, the Book of Mormon has been a part of my life since the womb. After all, my mom is very diligent in her scripture study. In first grade I would walk over to my grandma's after school. She insisted on teaching me how to read from it! (And I did NOT like it for many reasons - She made us read the heading, I struggled with the words, and I was so done with "looking" in 1 Nephi 11... thank goodness for the patient women in our lives who do the hard things with us!) 

Because The Book of Mormon has literally been in my life every day since I can remember, (even the days I days I didn't read it, I thought about reading it :o ) I know I take it for granted, as well as the effects that it has had in my life. I didn't realize the incredible, monumental changes taking place in my life a page or a verse at a time. 

But now I know. 

At least in a small way how the Book of Mormon has altered my life for the better. As I have looked back at my life and realized the REAL power the book has given my life. I may not have understood the words and I KNOW I didn't catch on to a lot of the principles being taught. I still don't. Regardless, it has done more for me than I know. Because simply by reading The Book of Mormon we invite God's spirit to join us in our lives. And that, my friends, is real power. That one simple principle is huge! Life-altering.

To answer the question I have asked myself so many times - Because of the Book of Mormon (drumroll please):

I know who I am. 

I am a daughter of God. So simple - and yet it is everything! There is an infinity of lessons we can learn from this book. This is the one I have narrowed it down to that has been the foundation of everything else. Because of the Book of Mormon I have been given strength every day from the knowledge of knowing of my divine lineage. As I have grown up I have struggled with low self confidence and low self-esteem. Yet I have never questioned my self worth. Somehow, deep down, when the world whispered to me that I am fat, ugly, dumb, that nobody wants me or loves me, or that I don't have friends and I'm a loser - I believed it. Yet - and this is the great conundrum - I still KNEW that I was of infinite worth. Somebody loved me. Somebody cared for me. I did have purpose. I knew that I was beautiful, smart, intelligent and that my real best friend was the only one that really mattered. I only had to care about what He thought of me- that is Jesus Christ. That knowledge has enabled me to push through and reach up at times when all I wanted to do was melt into the ground and be forgotten. That single knowledge that was planted so deeply within me got me through all my darkest days. It is why I've made the good choices I have made throughout my life. It has got me out of bed when I didn't feel there was a purpose or the thought of facing another day seemed too daunting.

I received a blessing years ago, and the words may have become fogged up my somewhat unreliable mind, but I remember being told that as I studied the word of God, my confidence would grow before others. I wanted this blessing because it is something I knew I struggled with. I didn't understand it, but I believed it anyways. It didn't happen magically overnight. Yet, as the days became weeks and the weeks months, and the months years, I slowly gained more confidence as my relationship with Heavenly Father increased. I cared less about what others thought of me, or what I judged them to be judging of me. I began to care more about being worried and embarrassed about what God thought of me and my actions. I realized that if I can stand confident before God, I can stand confident before anybody! 

Life really is all about choices. I'm sure not perfect or even as good as I want to be. Yet I know each and every day we make tiny choices that effect us for the rest of our lives. Going to church. Saying prayers. Reading the scriptures. The day I changed my major to art. The moment I was landscaping with my dad and a thought turned into a decision- It had only been a month since I had last talked to the Bishop and he had sent me away. But for one last time I was going to schedule another appointment with the Bishop, and I WAS going to start mission papers. I was determined. These tiny little choices that completely alter where we are, who we are, what we do and ultimately who we become. 

The Book of Mormon is amazing because it is TRUTH. Knowledge of truth is the key to unlocking our minds to be happy regardless of anything we encounter in this world. We know Christ through this book, and we can overcome anything and everything as we look to Him. The Book of Mormon has changed my life, has changed the life of others, and will continue to change more lives all over the earth because it is TRUTH. And truth sets us free. “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” (John 8:31-32.)

Don't have one yet?! Get your free copy here!!

(Because, who doesn't love FREE?!? ;) ) 

And!! Watch this video! 

My Favorite Pen

The S.K.B. SB-1000 Pen



I found one of these pens in my penholder which I'm sure was probably kidnapped from my mom's house from one of her many pen stashes. It doesn't look like anything spectacular. Just a regular pen. Right? But I LOVE it. About a year ago I lost it. I was devastated. I couldn't remember the brand. Just what it looked like and how much I loved it. I searched and searched. Wal*Mart, Porters, K*Mart, Staples, Office Max... no bueno. No favorite pen.

My friend called me after it had been MIA for a couple weeks and told me she had been cleaning out her car and asked if it was mine. It was! A miracle! I'm surprised she didn't just take it inside to stash with their pens - seriously, it looks like it's nothing special. But, I love it. Blue, super fine point, makes my handwriting look better than it usually does and fits more letters onto a line. It's awesome. Christmas is coming up, so is March 6. And I love colors. Hint, Hint ;)

http://www.skbpens.com/

Pumpkin Carving

It's October! My favorite season deserves a post, huh? :) 

Last night for FHE we carved pumpkins. I started gutting out a pumpkin and saw a kid in my ward standing around watching.  I asked him if he wanted to pick out a design for the one I was working on. He did. It became a VW Bus. Super cool. :)

PS - I'm not sickly. I forgot to put make-up on. Whoops! :o How did that slip my mind?

The license plate has our initials, "J K" :)

Man I like boys... I sure am going to miss them  :-/ ;)